Writing a blog is healthy right? Any sort of journalistic expression is a well-known method for relieving stress and increasing processing speed. Yet many of us stray away from public journaling as we feel we lack the qualities of confidence, self-indulgence and time. It seems it is far easier to maintain a more passive connection with the world by posting pictures on social media. I don’t like doing what is instinctively easy and I’ve made it an unconscious habit to guide myself towards opportunities that feel scary; as the countdown to my long-awaited graduation continues. So today I am going to write for myself my thoughts and experiences over the last few weeks concerning establishing a new theatre society and casting for my latest play. It seems only right that afterwards I edit these words into a somewhat helpful fashion for those interested in the social and organisational hurdles that come with running a society whist studying for a degree.
Someone I met recently told me about how we are all buying time. Whenever we speak with a person with more experience than us in a given field we are gaining the knowledge they have spent hours developing effectively cheating time. I feel that this is the reason for the expression ‘If you are the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.’ This begs the question how does one maintain their sense of identity and self-worth whilst living in the ‘right room’. The right room being an environment where an individual is continually challenged. Setting up a new society comes with the challenges of imagining the expectations and thoughts of hundreds of people who will hear about it. As Outreach coordinator for The Immersive Theatre Society in Nottingham it is very much my responsibility to help culture a supportive and wholesome theatre community. While the vision of ours is somewhat idyllic, the smaller steps to reach this goal I have found elusive. In other words I have very much placed myself in the right room.
So for me much of the challenge in the process has been to do with confidence. I have noticed in myself often trying to imagine a reaction to the words I say publicly and the events I organise before I announce them. It is an absolutely amazing thing to be considerate and essential for a good producer. However, if you have ever found yourself in a position like me where you spend hours overthinking what the reaction to your ideas might be, its time to clamp down on that thought process. I’ve found the positive enforcement of small habits essential in desensitising myself from my role this week. If you want to read more, try just 30mins before you go to bed, if you want to write more, write 100 words a day. Personally, the latest small habit I’ve taken up is writing Poetry every day. This works well for me as it fills both a creative and journaling quota for the day and can be written in about 10mins so it is really easy to adopt this habit. Having a greater confidence in myself within my social life helps steel my fear of expressing myself through society socials and events. A sense of oneness in the self, improves my productivity within my role allowing me to communicate with all the people that I need to in a day for organising audition plans, society socials and future show ideas. Social media is a vice, I need it to make arrangements with people and yet the use of it devours my time with procrastination. I’ve found the use of social media office hours of 9am, 1pm and 5pm useful for not having my degree tasks during the day distracted by other plans.
This week I have also been running casting for my fringe production. This role has taught me that when a project is at its early stages and vulnerable own it. Tell absolutely every one you meet about it and share the passion and enthusiasm you have about it. Don’t worry about if they aren’t interested or whether they think you’re being egotistical. Even though your project doesn’t exist yet, it does in your head and the strength of that vision is all that matters now. People love experts and be confident in yourself when you say that you are an expert in this. Logistically producing your own play is easy. Anyone can do it! The main necessity’s that have got me though the process so far are: love for the project, a reliable production team who you can learn to utilise so you don’t over work yourself and managing your own deadlines.
To summarise productivity is a cold mistress. In a world of social influencers and study bloggers, efficiency is fetishized in an environment filled with anxiety and distraction. Its only human to want to feel we have control over our own lives. I’ve found recently though that everyone has a different relationship with productivity and for me developing a mentality of kind discipline helps me overcome the societal pressures surrounding starting something new. In two weeks time the society and my play will grow into something I cannot predict or control. I am ready for that now, and I’m looking forward to the challenges this new beginning will present me.